It happened towards the end of secondary school. Sunlight was cutting through the classroom, and it must have been close to lunchtime because the air was caramel-thick with boredom. This was in the queasy final weeks before the Leaving Cert, the state exams every Irish teenager has to sit if they want to go to university.
Previously on Spirit:
To deepen his understanding of Japanese culture, Herrigel began training in Kyudo, the Japanese martial art of archery. He was taught by a legendary archer named Awa Kenzo. Kenzo was convinced that beginners should master the fundamentals of archery before attempting to shoot at a real target, and he took this method to the extreme. For the first four years of his training, Herrigel was only allowed to shoot at a roll of straw just seven feet away.
Patience and understanding towards other human beings is an essential life skill. It’s also a critical ingredient in dealing with life’s bullshit. Cause, we both know that life is gonna hand you and enormous amount of bullshit. Life is full of circumstances that are often outside of your control. The sooner you learn to appreciate that a certain amount of bullshit as inevitable the better.
Though the point of having options is to eventually commit to something, having too many options can prevent us from committing to anything at all. When the going gets tough, people with a litany of options are more likely to jump ship than navigate the rocky waters.
Arthur C. Brooks is an American social scientist, the William Henry Bloomberg Professor of the Practice of Public Leadership at the Harvard Kennedy School, and Professor of Management Practice at the Harvard Business School. He has authored eleven books, including the bestsellers Love Your Enemies and The Conservative Heart, and writes the popular “How to Build a Life” column at The Atlantic.
Self-compassion is simply offering the same kindness to yourself as you would to others. This requires empathy. Empathy is the ability to sense other people's emotions and to imagine what they might be thinking or feeling, while compassion is when you relate to that person’s situation and are prepared to help. Think of compassion as a two-way process. Showing empathy, love and concern for people who are in difficulty is one way. Self-compassion, or the ability to turn understanding, acceptance and love inwards, is the other. By not holding yourself to impossible standards, you can be kind to yourself, particularly in the face of setbacks.
I want to offer you a simple idea. The idea is given a perfect and memorable distillation in the above quotation, from the man who stands at the center of history. While you may debate me over his status as God and Lord, I find very few people who wish to contest his standing as a great teacher.
I have witnessed this sense of disillusion over and over in my clinic – clients who have built unrealistic expectations of that new job, of life after the wedding, of being parents, of retirement and so on. The reality is, if you expect to have all of your needs met once you meet a certain goal, you are going to end up disappointed. Take a moment to try and tease apart what is a ‘desire’ and what is ‘realistic’. If you hold realistic expectations, you avoid experiencing unnecessary disappointment and may even give yourself the opportunity to enjoy your accomplishments.
I recently saw this Reddit post about a guy who automated his job and collected a paycheck for 6 years while doing basically no work. Sounds like a nice gig, right? Who wouldn’t want to get paid to do as little as possible? Who wouldn’t want to make money while browsing the internet or playing video games all day?
To feel sufficient, to be satisfied with what we have: Chisoku in Japanese.
Of course, by some measures, there’s never enough. We can always come up with a reason why more is better, or better is better, or new is better or different is better.
It probably depends on who’s blog post you’re reading. Everyone has their take on this, but here’s mine. Let me start by being real with you. I’ve been making well over 6 figures since I was 24 years old. And that’s not to brag, at all. I want to share that no matter how much money I’ve earned, it didn’t buy ME happiness.
One way to appreciate virtually any moment of your life is to pretend that the whole thing is already over.
People tend to know what makes them angry with more certainty than what might make them happy. Happiness is complicated because you keep moving the goalposts. Misery is more durable.
Sadhguru recites one of his poems and goes on to speak about the unique privilege of being human.
It is often a struggle just to stay afloat. But if you had enough money, would you pursue more of it – or should time now be our greatest aspiration?
Has the world gone grey? Are you wondering what life is for? Kierkegaard’s philosophy could help you rediscover your zing.
Osho
